Tiresome Tuesday

Have you ever felt like there's a weight on your shoulders soo heavy you can hardly move and you are so tiresome that you wanna stay in the covers for like a week? This is kinda what I've felt like since the end of last week. This weekend was a whirlwind of emotion, gossip, rumors, lies, truths, YOU NAME IT and without specifics (because they are unnecessary) I simply ask for prayer that peace, humility, kindness, love, gentleness & strength would dwell over this community. Lives have and will continue to change...this is life...there is nothing we can do to stop that but trust God for WHO HE IS. God's plan is ALWAYS greater than ours and even though we do not see that initially 95% of the time, it doesn't mean He's forsaken us or forgotten us. We are having growing pains! I remember being pregnant with Shelby all too well what "growing pains" truly felt like so that's what this is. We all need to be growing together and not falling apart. Love is all that matters... as a dear, precious friend quoted to me, "beauty from ashes..." Isaiah 61 talks about this and how true that is...
I've learned this week that I'm a person who feel like I have to carry other's burdens on my shoulders. A friend told me, "you are a caring person who feels the need to be a burden carrier. It's good that you are so caring but it's not your burden to bear or carry." How true she is. I guess I always feel the need to have everything fixed, in line, organized and everyone happy. Well, as we all know, that's an endless battle that can never be won. Guess it's also my OCD spirit. lol... I really feel like I've been in a dream and will wake up any minute but that's not the case so what I've gotta do is pick myself up, and continue on...be caring but not a burden "carrier"... God is my burden carrier...He paid the price that I might live and have life ABUNDANTLY, that means TO THE FULLEST!Right now, I'm not honoring that. I've dwelt TOO LONG on the past and the "could be's and what if's"...
So, my "therapy" to get me out of this valley is creativity. Always has been, always will be. My mind seems to work the most creative when I'm in a trial or valley. So, we'll see...My wheels have been churning and turning all week and BOY O BOY do I have some neat ideas! So, I'm off to write them down before I forget..guess I can't blame it on pregnancy-brain any longer so I must find some excuse for my forgetfullness..any ideas? LOL...
well I HOPE to have something new to post tonight or tomorrow as a result of my "therapy" session I plan to have after Shelby goes to bed, which by the way, IS A AMAZING that she puts herself to sleep now. We HAVE TO put her down at 8:30pm (no later than 9pm) or she is a bear and no more rocking...she wants to be laid down, w/ her Sally the Seahorse (had an unfortunate incident w/ Sammy being slammed on the floor on purpose by mommy trying to make him work again b/c that was advice that had been given to me so I aided in his death and cannot for the life of me throw him away so Shelby has a "Sally" (Pink Seahorse, are you surprised?) and a "Sammy" (which he's just there for moral support), a pink fluffy bear that was a Gund Soothing bear but the stupid music got on my nerves when she'd play it at 3am so the mechanism was PROMPTLY removed) and her "Bankie" (blanket) and she's good as gold. Sleeps about 10 hours a night! Wakes up at 6 - 7 am SMILING AND HAPPY! :) We are so blessed...
hmmm.. what valley?? I live on a mountain-top because of God and the blessings He has given me!
~God bless